So When Can We Be Friends Again

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If you made the leap to tell your friend that y'all similar them and they rejected you, fifty-fifty to the indicate of not talking to you anymore, it can be a real blow. Information technology can be difficult to rebuild a friendship with someone in one case you've confessed you like them as more a friend. Yet, if you each give yourself time, affirm the importance of your friendship, and work hard to rebuild connection and healthy boundaries, you could become friends again.

  1. 1

    Ensure you've given yourself plenty time. Once your friend has rejected you, make sure to give you and your friend some time to process and readjust. Yous both probably feel uncertain most what the two of you now accept, so requite some time to remember things through. If yous commonly spend every weekend with them or talk to them frequently via text, give yourself a few days apart and decrease your advice during that time.

    • Keep in mind there's no fix time limit for getting over someone. Go with your instincts on how much space or time you both need, simply don't avert each other for too long.
    • If after a few days or weeks you feel you lot've candy your initial sadness, reach out to them to meet if they're open up to talking and spending time together. If they're still uncomfortable, ask them how much longer they need and let them know you'll be in that location for them when they're ready to talk again.[1]
  2. 2

    Affirm the importance of your friendship. Acknowledge that your friendship probably won't e'er be quite the same again, just assert how of import it is for you lot to even so be their friend. Let them know that no thing the rejection, yous even so value them as a friend. Communicate how being their friend means a lot to you.[two]

    • Yous can say, "Yous still mean a lot to me as a friend and I'd like to endeavour to exist friends still, even if it'south a piffling awkward at first."

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  3. 3

    Have responsibility. Accept responsibility for trying to change the boundaries of your friendship. Admit that you know information technology may have been awkward for them to hear your inverse feelings. Show that y'all can handle the rejection well past accepting your friend'due south feelings and not trying to fight with them or modify their mind.[3]

    • You lot can say, "I know this is probably bad-mannered for you and I'm deplorable for putting you in this position. Thanks for listening."
  4. 4

    Explain yourself. Explain your reasoning behind confessing feelings to your friend. Allow your friend know that you had to tell them the truth because your friendship has always been based on openness, honesty, and trust. If you've been good friends for awhile, have spent a lot of quality time together, and accept developed this openness and honesty with each other, your friendship will have a better take chances of restarting.[iv]

    • You lot can say, "I would regret it if I never told you how I really felt, and I'm glad we're such good friends that I could be honest with you."
  5. 5

    Ask what your friend needs. Together, talk over specific ways yous can return to your friendship. Check-in with your friend about what they need or want from you now that y'all've confessed your feelings. Check-in on how they see the situation and ask if they have any ideas for making things better betwixt the 2 of you.[5]

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  1. one

    Render to normal. The earlier you render to your normal design of interaction with your friend, the easier and less awkward it volition exist between the 2 of you. Returning to the normal style you spend time with them will bear witness you've accepted and moved on from the rejection. Avoiding each other will only increase clumsiness and go on you both from returning to friendship.[6]

  2. ii

    Create new, good for you boundaries. Yous'll desire to return to your normal ways of communicating and spending time with your friend, with a few exceptions. Now that you're trying to rebuild your friendship, you lot might want to do some things differently and so as to avoid catching feelings again. If at that place'south too much pressure to human action differently around each other, you may not exist able to rekindle the friendship. Some boundaries to set include:[7] [eight]

    • Avert flirtatious behavior, touching, and sexual innuendo.
    • Exist careful when talking about their beloved life and dating other people.
    • Avoid holding out promise that they'll change or fall in dear with you later.
  3. 3

    Develop other relationships and interests. Brand certain you make fourth dimension for other interests and activities. Explore other friendships and dating other people. This volition help you move on from whatsoever feelings y'all had for your friend. Be sure to develop other friendships where you can hash out love and dating more than openly than you might with your friend.[9]

  4. 4

    Look at your patterns. Explore what fabricated you determine to endeavour to take your friendship beyond its electric current status. Reexamine if yous read as well much into their behavior, if you typically autumn for friends or others who aren't really available to y'all, or if you lot developed too much intimacy with your friend too presently. Talk about these patterns with a advisor or a friend who knows you well so that y'all tin can prevent falling for your friend once more, or falling for some other friend.[10] These patterns could occur considering:

    • Y'all've been hurt in the past and are scared of existent commitment.
    • You desire to protect yourself from future rejection in a relationship past choosing someone who is already unavailable or uninterested.
    • You don't believe you're deserving or worthy of love.
  5. 5

    Learn and motility on. Take heart in the fact that your crush on your friend has taught you what you value in a relationship. You've learned what you lot capeesh in a significant other and what's attractive to you. Utilize that cognition to other relationships. Learn to grow the intimacy you've shared with your friend in other relationships.

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  • If you mope effectually after you're rejected, it just serves every bit a reminder that this person didn't "give" you what you wanted. Instead, effort to gracefully accept the rejection and move on. If you tin't accept the rejection, you probable cannot return to beingness "only friends."

  • Both of you are probably embarrassed past an encounter like this. So both of you will need support, from each other and from other friends.

  • Requite your friend time if needed, but don't avoid each other if yous're both genuinely interested in wanting to preserve the friendship.

  • If you continue to agree out hope that your friend volition return feelings, you lot're non being fair to the friendship.

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Article Summary X

If you desire to become friends over again with someone you told you like, wait a few weeks until you've gotten over your feelings for them. When your romantic feelings have faded, tell your friend that you lot'd like to be friends again, like you were. For example, say something like, "I remember I've gotten over my feelings for you and I'd like to try to be friends nonetheless, fifty-fifty if it's a piddling bad-mannered at first." When you hang out with them, endeavor to human activity similar you lot do around your other friends, and so things volition beginning to feel normal over again. You can besides make some new friends and consider dating other people, which will take your heed off your other friend. For more than tips from our co-author, including how to avoid flirting with your friend, read on.

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